The 5 Voices & Self-Awareness

Hi Reader,

Last week I asked you to write down your communication strengths and where you struggle. If you listed things like "I'm a good listener," "I care about people," or "I avoid unnecessary conflict," this email is probably for you.

The Nurturer voice is the most common foundational voice in the 5 Voices framework. 43% of people lead from here. And if it's yours, your team is better for it. Nurturers are the ones who actually feel how a decision will land on people before it gets made. They notice who's struggling before anyone else does. They create the kind of environment where people feel safe enough to do their best work.

That's a real gift.

Yet, Nurturers can also have a tendency to avoid conflict. Not because they don't have an opinion (they usually have strong ones) but because keeping the peace feels more like protecting the people around them. So in a meeting where something feels off, the Nurturer can choose to stay quiet instead of challenging. They don't say the thing that needs to be said. And either they walk out thinking they were being considerate or feeling frustrated because nothing changed when it needed to.

In these circumstances, your team just lost the one voice most focused on how this will affect people. That's significant.

If you lead with the Nurturer voice, the work isn't to become someone who loves conflict. It's to recognize that saying the hard thing, delivered with the care you already have, is one of the most valuable things you can do for the people you're trying to protect.

And if Nurturer isn't your leading voice, there's still a critical question we must consider. We need to activate our Nurturer voice before we decide. How is this decision going to affect the poeple on my team? My organization? My clients? If you’re first voice isn’t Nurturer, it’s easy to skip that step, but Nurturers never do. That instinct is worth developing regardless of where this voice falls in your order.

Your challenge this week:
​Think of one conversation you've been avoiding or one concern you've left unspoken. You don't have to have that conversation this week. Just write it down. Name what you've been holding back and who needs to hear it. The next step is to determine your next action?

Sometimes the most caring thing is the honest thing.

Lead with Purpose,
--Jason

PS. If you haven't taken the 5 Voices assessment yet, it's free and worth doing before the next email. You can create a free account at exanimo.giantos.com/store/5-voices​